The Lolly bus rolling one hundred thousand miles has caused me to recollect the places it’s been and the cargo it’s carried over the past eight years. There’s the surface memories: the trek to Houston with Jacob, many trips to the beach and the mountains of North Carolina, and Virginia, bikes in tow to ride the Creeper Trail with Caroline. Then there were the moves, from our first custom home to a rental to our second build, two classrooms and two apartments for our daughter, and a Goodwill run for our eldest before he moved cross country. Learning mountain biking and whitewater kayaking together for Jacob’s sake and hauling the Danes for my hubby’s, the bus has been equal to every challenge! The very best passengers to date occupy the four car seats, two toddler and two rear facing.
Before the grandchildren, the Great Danes, Jake and Ella, were my constant companions. We picked up grocery and Target orders together, carpooled Jacob to and from work and every activity before he was able to drive, and visited friends and family in and out of town. On one such trip, Jacob and I had gone to the beach a day ahead of Paul to air out the house and stock the pantry. I slid the side door of the bus open for the pups to climb aboard, always Jake first followed by timid Ella. Though they weren’t yet fully grown, they were both nearing the one hundred pound mark. Ella’s hind leg slipped as she made her leap into her regular spot. I had ahold of her harness but I instinctively stepped forward, hoping to prevent a fall. Her elbow connected solidly with the inside of my left leg just above my ankle. The counter pressure gave her the the oomph she needed to gain her spot. I clicked her harness to her riding brace and limped around to the drivers seat for the grocery run.
I rubbed the spot above my ankle, thinking, “that will surely leave a bruise,” and it did, even before I returned to the house half an hour later. I took the dogs inside, put away the groceries and elevated my leg while applying an ice pack. By morning, the bruise wrapped around my ankle and covered my entire foot. Over the next few weeks, it faded through every shade of a storm before the real pain set in. I noticed on the ride to church that every bump in the road jarred my leg. The skin was red and warm, prickled with white spots. Underneath the skin, infection was brewing. I would need to have the area opened and cleared of necrotic tissue before real healing could happen. I’m far too squeamish for what the coming weeks required, irrigating and packing the open wound, but thankfully, I had help. My husband is trained in surgery and my daughter thought the exposed anatomy was fascinating.
My leg healed fully but bears a distinctive scar to this day. As I reminded my grandson today when he stumbled and scraped his knee and his palms, our battle scars remind us we’re made out of good stuff and that God is good. No one leaves this life unscathed. From birth on, trauma is a part of living. The important thing is whether we allow God to do His work in us, to stretch us and grow us, to fulfill His purposes through us. As butterflies shed their chrysalis and emerge transformed, “Anyone who is joined to Christ is a new being; the old is gone, the new has come.”
2 Corinthians 5:17 GNT
https://bible.com/bible/68/2co.5.17.GNT
Paul described it this way.
“I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.
The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”
Galatians 2:20 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/gal.2.20.NIV
Baptism by immersion in the Baptist tradition is often accompanied by the words of the great commission, adding “buried with Christ in baptism, raised to walk in newness of life.” Scripture is beautifully reflected in this act of obedience modeled by Christ. Moving forward in faith, or abiding in Christ, means allowing the Holy Spirit to bring to light the decaying flesh, those parts of my self life that must die as I am made whole. God strengthens me to allow Him to do the work of stripping away grave clothes. All that does not resemble Christ must go!
“So then, let us rid ourselves of everything that gets in the way, and of the sin which holds on to us so tightly, and let us run with determination the race that lies before us.
Let us keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from beginning to end.”
Hebrews 12:1-2 GNT
https://bible.com/bible/68/heb.12.1-2.GNT
The question I must continually ask myself is this: what am I holding onto of my self life? What is festering under the surface causing me pain yet I refuse to allow it into the Light? Which wounds need to be opened and washed with Holy Water before they can fully heal? How is the enemy manipulating my emotions, prodding me with past mistakes, or allowing me to believe it’s just how I’m made, that I’ll never break free.
“At last we have freedom, for Christ has set us free!
We must always cherish this truth and firmly refuse to go back into the bondage of our past.”
Galatians 5:1 TPT
https://bible.com/bible/1849/gal.5.1.TPT
God revealed to the prophet Samuel that He saw David as a man after God’s own heart. David was far from perfect. Only Jesus lived a perfect life, completely without sin. David was a man who saw himself rightly before God. God would preserve the line of David to produce Messiah, the King of all kings. Repentance and worship characterized David’s life but he was not impervious to temptation. Bathsheba is proof positive. A lesser known example is also included in scripture.
“Now Satan entered the scene and seduced David into taking a census of Israel.
David gave orders to Joab and the army officers under him, “Canvass all the tribes of Israel, from Dan to Beersheba, and get a count of the population.
I want to know the number.”
Joab resisted: “May God multiply his people by hundreds!
Don’t they all belong to my master the king?
But why on earth would you do a thing like this—why risk getting Israel into trouble with God?””
1 Chronicles 21:1-3 MSG
https://bible.com/bible/97/1ch.21.1-3.MSG
Power has allure in every generation. Conquests come with bragging rights. David was a man’s man. Songs of his military might had tormented his predecessor, Saul, while David led his armies. “In their celebration the women sang, “Saul has killed thousands, but David tens of thousands.””
1 Samuel 18:7 GNT
https://bible.com/bible/68/1sa.18.7.GNT
This same David demanded that the captain of his vast forces ride throughout his kingdom to number his fighting men. He was dangerously close to the sin of Nebuchadnezzar. “He said, “Look how great Babylon is! I built it as my capital city to display my power and might, my glory and majesty.”” (Daniel 4:30) God was not pleased and all Israel suffered for David’s sin. When the prophet, Gad confronted him, David threw himself on God’s mercy and quickly acted in obedience to God’s command. He built an altar at the place God instructed him to offer sacrifices. As king, he had authority to take what he wanted but the man after God’s heart had learned from his past.
“And David said to Ornan, “Give me the site of the threshing floor that I may build on it an altar to the Lord—give it to me at its full price—that the plague may be averted from the people.”
Then Ornan said to David, “Take it, and let my Lord the king do what seems good to him. See, I give the oxen for burnt offerings and the threshing sledges for the wood and the wheat for a grain offering; I give it all.”
But King David said to Ornan, “No, but I will buy them for the full price. I will not take for the Lord what is yours, nor offer burnt offerings that cost me nothing.””
1 Chronicles 21:22-24 ESV
https://bible.com/bible/59/1ch.21.22-24.ESV
“Jesus said to all of his followers, “If you truly desire to be my disciple, you must disown your life completely, embrace my ‘cross’ as your own, and surrender to my ways.
For if you choose self-sacrifice, giving up your lives for my glory, you will discover true life.
But if you choose to keep your lives for yourselves, you will lose what you try to keep.
Even if you gained all the wealth and power of this world, and all the things it could offer you, yet lost your soul in the process, what good is that?”
Luke 9:23-25 TPT
https://bible.com/bible/1849/luk.9.23-25.TPT
Jesus paid the ultimate price to make God life possible for you and me. He did not promise it would be an easy life, but He did promise to be present with us always.
““Don’t look for shortcuts to God.
The market is flooded with surefire, easygoing formulas for a successful life that can be practiced in your spare time.
Don’t fall for that stuff, even though crowds of people do.
The way to life—to God!—is vigorous and requires total attention.”
Matthew 7:13-14 MSG
https://bible.com/bible/97/mat.7.13-14.MSG
“Enter through the narrow gate because the wide gate and broad path is the way that leads to destruction—nearly everyone chooses that crowded road!
The narrow gate and the difficult way leads to eternal life—so few even find it!””
Matthew 7:13-14 TPT
https://bible.com/bible/1849/mat.7.13-14.TPT
“Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.”
John 14:6 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/jhn.14.6.NLT
What are you holding onto from your life before Christ?
Lay it down at Jesus’s feet and keep laying it down for as long as it takes.
A Fitting Reply 