My daughter and I know better. When she visits and her boys are in bed, we should not be far behind them. She needs more sleep than she tends to get and so do I. I am able to buy her a little time in the mornings, but her boys will be up with first light. We know this, still we linger over cups of tea. We talk about everything and nothing. We stand to go, then continue our conversation another half hour. Our parting words trail off toward either end of the house after a long hug. We may wish we could sleep a little longer come morning but we go to bed a little lighter, mutually encouraged.
Caroline Rebekah was a quiet, calm child, listening more than she spoke and very deliberate with her words. Her playfulness and competitive spirit was most obvious with her brothers. She was otherwise reserved, holding her thoughts and feelings close. Contemplatives like her are often a dreamy sort but her focused thoughts were of a much more practical nature. She is quick witted like her daddy but you may not be privy to it unless you know her well and she trusts you. She is discerning and Spirit-filled. She has mastered Jesus’s command to deny herself and follow Him without question or hesitation.
I heard her the other day telling four year old Thomas, who was in a mood, about how I helped her find her smile when she was little. I could always tell when something was bothering her, but getting it out of her was like pulling teeth. Well, maybe not exactly since she was under sedation when her last eight baby teeth, which refused to come out on their own, were extracted. Her first loose tooth barely hung by a thread when her daddy asked to see it up close. He quickly yanked it and was never allowed close enough for that to happen again. One she lost eating pasta. The oral surgeon was a God-send, effectively bankrupting the tooth fairy while preparing her for braces. During that season, I wrote on her mirror, the prettiest thing you can wear is a smile.
It was during those preteen years that we started reading through the Bible together. I made it a habit to have Bible reading and prayers with our children every evening before bed. Setting aside that one on one time gave them an opportunity to have my undivided attention. Some of our best talks were during those evenings. Jacob was always first because he was early to bed, early to rise. He still is. Aaron was next because he wanted time to himself to wind down after we said goodnight. By the time I got to Caroline, she was ready for her bedtime routine, so I stood outside the shower curtain, leaning against the doorframe, reading aloud through the Bible from a boxed set my mom gave me one year for my birthday.
We read through that boxed set at least four times before she graduated high school and several more times during her three years of college. We laughed as I fumbled through pronouncing names and places, and she thoughtfully interjected what was in her own mind as I read. It was accountability at its finest for both of us. She chose to live at home during college, preferring her privacy to dormitory living, and she graduated early. She is the most auditory learner I’ve ever encountered. I am easily distracted by stray thoughts while listening but not Caroline. We grew in Spirit and in Truth together in that season and I am forever grateful for the friendship we forged in God’s Word.
“When we get together, I want to encourage you in your faith, but I also want to be encouraged by yours.”
Romans 1:12 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/rom.1.12.NLT
“Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.
If one person falls, the other can reach out and help.
But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer.
Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.”
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, 12 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/ecc.4.9-12.NLT
That last verse is often applied to marriage but it is just as applicable to our relationships with our brothers and sisters in Christ. God is that third, strengthening strand, inhabiting us by His Spirit and allowing our spirits to find common ground in His Word. It’s risky to know and be known by another, but when two are intimately acquainted with God through Jesus, our kinship transcends mere friendship. We are not called to simply commiserate. We are meant to be iron sharpening iron, built up by our interactions and building others up. (Proverbs 27:17, Ephesians 4:29)
“So does belonging to Christ help you in any way?
Does his love comfort you at all?
Do you share anything in common because of the Holy Spirit?
Has Christ ever been gentle and loving toward you?
If any of these things has happened to you, then agree with one another.
Have the same love.
Be one in spirit and in the way you think and act.
By doing this, you will make my joy complete.
Don’t do anything only to get ahead.
Don’t do it because you are proud.
Instead, be humble.
Value others more than yourselves.
None of you should look out just for your own good.
Each of you should also look out for the good of others.
As you deal with one another, you should think and act as Jesus did.
God is working in you.
He wants your plans and your acts to fulfill his good purpose.”
Philippians 2:1-5, 13 NIRV
https://bible.com/bible/110/php.2.1-13.NIRV
My daughter still listens to an annual read through the Bible plan nightly while she showers and gets ready for bed. She is heeding the psalmists advice to hide God’s living and active, eternal and unchanging Word in her heart. God meets her in those moments, preparing her for what’s ahead, buoying her spirits and inexplicably empowering her day to day with two boys. When we get together, it feels like no time has passed. We pick up where we left off, encouraging one another as we walk by faith and not by sight.
When you and I meet together here on this page, I share bits of my story, glimpses into my thoughts, which may prove interesting to you. Maybe you’ve had a similar experience or wondered if anyone else feels as you do. I believe we are drawn together providentially. It is no accident that you picked up your phone, opened an app, clicked a link and continued reading. You are the reason God prompted me to begin writing mid-cancer treatment four and a half years ago. He wants you to know Him, to know His love and forgiveness, His grace and mercy, and to experience His goodness. So each time I enter this space, I come first before my Father in heaven, asking what He would have me say using the words of the Psalmist. “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.”
Psalms 19:14 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/psa.19.14.NLT
“For I long to visit you so I can bring you some spiritual gift that will help you grow strong in the Lord.
For I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ.
It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes-”
Romans 1:11, 16 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/rom.1.11-16.NLT
“May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.”
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 NIV
A Fitting Reply 