“You didn’t say I love you,” Amelia said, genuine concern in her voice and in her eyes. This was the second time she had chided me in front of her mom for failing to say I love you before ending a phone call. We were on the front porch for Amelia and Ezra to play in the sunshine. Amelia had climbed up into her mom’s lap to show her something she had concocted in her play kitchen. Valentina and I had been discussing where I might have the back strap of a pair of Chaco sandals monogrammed for a gift. Apparently Chaco will monogram custom ordered pairs but not existing stock and the pair I had chosen was a limited edition, therefore not customizable. (Insert bewildered shrug.) Customer service meant something entirely different a few decades ago, but that’s a story for another day.
I spoke to the customer representative briefly, then called a local monogramming shop where I got a hopeful maybe. I would need to bring in a pair of this specific sandal for someone to determine whether or not a monogram could be applied. At the end of this call, I looked over to relay the run around I was given to Valentina and caught Amelia’s eye. She repeated, just as bewildered, “You didn’t say I love you, Yolly.” Honestly it took a moment to register and before I could respond, her mom answered with a grin. “We don’t say I love you to everybody we talk to on the phone, sweetheart. Just family.” She’s right. We don’t. That was several days ago and it’s been on my mind a lot.
We say we love autumn, we love bagels or lattes from our favorite spot, we love golf, and we love when our team wins. We have essentially relegated love to all the favorite things and a few select people, but in the process we have denied its essence and withheld its holy wonder from a lovesick world. Nothing compares to knowing we are loved unabashedly. Why are we so self conscious about expressing love as God intended? Maybe because we have tried to separate love from God, and that, my friends, is impossible because God is love.
“We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us.
God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.”
1 John 4:16 NASB1995
https://bible.com/bible/100/1jn.4.16.NASB1995
““For this is how God loved the world:
He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.”
John 3:16 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/jhn.3.16.NLT
“This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.”
1 John 4:10 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/1jn.4.10.NLT
“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love.
Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.
No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Romans 8:38-39 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/rom.8.39.NLT
God’s love is demonstrative. He does not merely pronounce His love for us, though His Word, the Bible, is so filled with God’s great love for humanity that it is often referred to as God’s love letter. He proclaims it in our every breath for life is in Him. He announces it with each new day as the sun makes its circuit across the heavens. God’s love is in a mothers kiss, in an intimate embrace, in a shared smile, a hot meal, and a father’s strong arm. No wonder the enemy of our souls, who seeks only to kill, steal, and destroy, perverts what God created for good at every opportunity. God is love and He is also good. He is working all things together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them, even what the enemy means for evil. (Romans 8:28, Genesis 50:20)
During the Covid Pandemic, when churches were closed and gatherings took place online only, I was taking treatments for cancer. I had been leading a group of middle and high school girls in weekly Bible study and I was frustrated to have our time together restricted. In that season, by the Spirit’s prompting, I began writing lessons in the form of handwritten letters to those girls. I mailed nearly four dozen per week for several years. I signed those letters, “I love you, LeAnn,” and I meant it but still it felt awkward writing it, especially as I added new young ladies to my list. I explained with I John 4:19. I love you because Jesus loved me first. The love I extend is from Him. Never once did I hear an objection. What I saw when we began meeting together again was more than enough confirmation that God’s love was clearly communicated. I see that love being expressed still in the lives of many of those young ladies. It has been shown to me and to others they meet and minister to in their spheres of influence.
Amelia and I sat on my porch, this time reading Bible stories before bedtime and I reminded her of what she had observed that afternoon during my phone call. True, we don’t usually say I love you to people we know casually, even people we worship with, work with, encounter in coffee shops, restaurants or markets, but since before she was born she has seen framed on my kitchen wall words that beg the question. Should we?
“We love because He first loved us.”
I John 4:19
The One who loved us first is Jesus and his young disciple, John, the one who referred to himself in scripture as the one Jesus loved, wrote these words under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit. He was much older when he composed his letters to the churches. He had experienced more of the harshness of life, even in Christ, and gained a heart of wisdom. He wasn’t recording events like he did in the gospel with his name. He was working out life lessons for every believer. It won’t always be easy to say I love you and mean it but the same power God exerted when He raised Christ from death is at our disposal. (Ephesians 1:19-20)
““But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies!
Do good to those who hate you.
Bless those who curse you.
Pray for those who hurt you.
If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also.
If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also.
Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from you, don’t try to get them back.
Do to others as you would like them to do to you.
If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that?
Even sinners love those who love them!
And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit?
Even sinners do that much!
And if you lend money only to those who can repay you, why should you get credit?
Even sinners will lend to other sinners for a full return.
Love your enemies!
Do good to them.
Lend to them without expecting to be repaid.
Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.
You must be compassionate, just as your Father is compassionate.”
Luke 6:27-36 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/luk.6.27-36.NLT
“Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has become a child of God.
And everyone who loves the Father loves his children, too.
We know we love God’s children if we love God and obey his commandments.
Loving God means keeping his commandments, and his commandments are not burdensome.
For every child of God defeats this evil world, and we achieve this victory through our faith.
And who can win this battle against the world?
Only those who believe that Jesus is the Son of God.”
1 John 5:1-5 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/1jn.5.1-5.NLT
“Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own?
No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself.
Who then will condemn us?
No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us.
Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love?
Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?
No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.”
Romans 8:33-35, 37 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/rom.8.33-37.NLT
“When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth.
I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit.
Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him.
Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong.
And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is.
May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully.
Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.
Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.
Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever!
Amen.”
Ephesians 3:14-21 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/eph.3.14-21.NLT
“Finally, brothers and sisters, be joyful!
Work to make things right with one another.
Help one another and agree with one another.
Live in peace.
And the God who gives love and peace will be with you.
Greet one another with a holy kiss.
May the grace shown by the Lord Jesus Christ be with you all.
May the love that God has given us be with you.
And may the sharing of life brought about by the Holy Spirit be with you all.”
2 Corinthians 13:11-12, 14 NIRV
https://bible.com/bible/110/2co.13.11-14.NIRV
I love you. And in Christ, I mean it.
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